So you you adopted a drinking style, you got it all wrong, your drink style is thrusted upon you by might gods, next time you reach home late, don’t forget to blame your zodiac sign.
ARIES : Impulsive Aries like to party and sometimes don’t know when to call it a night. Their competitive streak makes them prone to participating in shot contests. They’re sloppy, fun drunks, and they get mighty flirty after a couple of drinks. Getting Aries drunk is a good way to get what you want out of them, should other methods fail.
TAURU: Taurus prefers to drink at a leisurely pace, aiming for a mellow glow rather than a full on zonk. Since a truly intoxicated Taurus is a one-person stampede, the kind of bull-in-a-china-shop inebriate who spills red wine on white carpets and tells fart jokes to employers.
GEMINI : Gemini’s can drink without changing their behavior much — they’re so naturally chatty and short-attention-spanned that it’s just hard to tell sometimes. They can amaze you by conversing with finesse and allusions,
then doing something to belie an extremely advanced state of intoxication, like puking in your shoe.
CANCER : Cancer is a comfort drinker — and an extra wine with dinner or an after-work beer or six can be extra comforting, can’t it, Cancer darling? Like fellow water signs Scorpio and Pisces, Crabs must guard against lushery.
LEO : Leo likes to drink and dance — they’re often fabulous dancers, and usually pretty good drinkers as well, losing their commanding dignity and turning kittenish. Of course, they’re quite aware they’re darling — Leos will be Leos, after all.
VIRGO : Cerebral Virgos are compelled to impose order onto their bender. Their famously fussy quest for purity could lead to drinking less than other signs, sure — but it could also lead to drinking booze neat, to sucking
down organic wine or just to brand loyalty.
LIBRA : “I’m just a social drinker,” slurs Libra, “it’s just that I’m so damn social?” Libra loves nothing more than to party, mingle and relate to everyone.
SCORPIO : Don’t ever tell Scorpios they’ve had enough, for they’ll smirk at you and quietly but intentionally keep tippling till they’re hog whimpering drunk, out of 100-proof spite. Scorpios like to drink, and screw you if
you have a problem with that.
SAGITTARIUS : In vino veritas — and, for Sagittarius, in booze blurtiness: When buttered, they’ll spill all your secrets and many of their own. Tactlessness aside, Sagittarius is just plain fun to drink with. This is
a sign of serious partying.
CAPRICORN : Capricorn is usually described as practical, steadfast, money-hungry and status-thirsty — no wonder they get left off the astrological cocktail-party list.
AQUARIUS : Aquarius and drinking don’t go together that well (except for water, that is). They have an innate tendency toward know-it-allism, and if they get an idea while sizzled, they’re more stubborn than a stain or a
PISCES : If you’re a Pisces, you’ve probably already heard that you share a sign — and an addictive personality — with Liz Taylor, Liza Minelli and Kurt Cobain.